…to have Scoliosis

I found out that I had scoliosis in 5th grade. I was going in for my regular check-up when they found a curve in my spine, and they confirmed I had Scoliosis. I didn’t know what it meant at the time. I just knew that my spine was curved. Having scoliosis was definitely a struggle. It was hard trying to relate to people my age because it wasn’t something that changed who I was, but it was something that affected what I could do.

As I got older, my back started to get really bad, fast. Between 7th and 8th grade my back went from 20 degrees to 50. Usually, it’s only supposed to move 2 degrees in one year and it went right to 30.

Before we even considered surgery, we took a look at other options. There was physical therapy and back braces available, but it was too expensive. We didn’t have medical insurance for a good portion of my life, so we couldn’t get it. We decided to just let it be. 

When I went for my checkup before freshman year, the doctor sat us down and started talking about getting surgery. We decided to do it in the summer because I wouldn’t be at school. It was a hard decision because I’ve never broken a bone. I’ve never sprained anything, so just to jump into this major surgery was very scary. I talked about it a lot because it helped, but it felt like everyone was annoyed with me.

I started to obsess over the surgery. I researched every possible complication and exactly what was going to happen. I really freaked myself out, but I knew that it was coming eventually. 

I was going to get Spine Fusion Surgery. The surgeons cut open your back, pull back the muscle, drill holes into your spine and put screws in, and then install the metal rods. They put them in to match your curve and then they yank the metal to straighten the rod and your back at the same time. 

The day before my surgery was my brother’s graduation party. It was a full day of doing stuff so it helped distract me. I remember sitting with my friend and I came to the realization that this was actually happening. In 10 hours a team of surgeons was going to be in my back. It was surreal because I’d been waiting for the day of the surgery for so long, but now it was actually happening.

I was very anxious on the day of the surgery. I had to wake up early to get to the hospital because we were scheduled for early morning surgery.  I remember walking into the hospital and it was empty. It was kind of scary. 

Right before the surgery, I needed to get a bunch of x-rays and a few MRIs. Once that was over, I was all prepared and given an IV. The last thing I remember was seeing my surgeon right before going into the operating room. The surgery took about 8 hours. 

When I woke up, it was really bright in my room, unusually bright. My mother was right there to see me when I woke up. 

The first night in the hospital just standing up was hard. I passed out when they first had me stand up. Recovery was horrible. I couldn’t get comfortable when I was trying to sleep, and I felt incredibly tired. 

 I had this bandage on my back for a while to keep the scar protected. The first time I took a shower at home, drying it off and taking it off hurt so bad. I was on a lot of pain medication but when they started to wear off it was horrible. 

I was always sleeping because I was constantly on pain medication and they made me extremely tired. 

I wasn’t formally diagnosed with post-op depression, but I definitely had it. I would complain about not being able to see my friends, but at the same time, I just wanted to be left alone. I couldn’t wrap my head around the fact that my back was literally cut open and fused with metal.

The hard pain only lasted a few weeks, but it felt like forever. By the time we got to school in August, most of my pain was gone. I didn’t have to take the hardcore pain medication anymore and I could wear a backpack again. I actually grew an inch and a half after surgery.

 I do still experience some back pain, but it isn’t nearly as bad as it was before. I am not able to bend my back at all, and it is impossible for me to slouch. I always have perfect posture. 

Unfortunately, I have not been able to participate in sports during my recovery. One of my goals is to get back into Tennis and Track as my back starts to get stronger. Even though the surgery was a difficult thing for me to go through, it was worth it in the long run.